She chastised herself for thinking of her husband and lord as being weak. So am I. A strong coarse man, and there were things in his eyes which made my blood run cold with terror. Brendon dismissed the subject with a wave of the hand. The latter took from his pocket a small note-book and pencil. She was never able to trace the changes her attitude had undergone, from the time when she believed herself to be the pampered Queen of Fortune, the crown of a good man’s love (and secretly, but nobly, worshipping some one else), to the time when she realized she was in fact just a mannequin for her lover’s imagination, and that he cared no more for the realities of her being, for the things she felt and desired, for the passions and dreams that might move her, than a child cares for the sawdust in its doll. The spinsters—who on the morrow would vanish out of the girl's life for ever—had already left their imprint upon her imagination. . She resolved not to allow him or her hunger detract from the performance at hand, as it would be a special one, an evening to be remembered in the gray days to follow like a precious jewel.
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